June 2010

MoonBlog 44.5

Unconscious

is what I feel like today, now. As if I had a severe blow to the head, somewhat intoxicated even.

I’m sitting here over emotional, but very quiet. Observing myself, my feelings, my triggers, my shadows, the timing and impact of things here and now. I’m feeling my gut, a knot.
Trying to dive in deeper, not running away. Even though I have done several distracting things, I don’t seem to be able to walk away from a deeper and longer experience of this, what is.

I had an ever ecstatic life building up since a few weeks ago. I am very busy with all these courses, interacting with people on different levels, and this permaculture/garden is taking up quite a bit of resources, mentally and physically.

In my ecstasy, I expanded some more towards others, and we shared our lives some more. I was not on a cloud yet, but I sure did feel like floating/flying.
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MoonBlog 3.2

GeneKeys complaint, money back guarantee?

after diving quite deep and feeling intense shadows and other past or present muddy waters, and the effects this process had and has on me, now doing the deep dive for the second time actually helps me feel more shallow in its process (!)

Not arrogance though, but because the 1st DD process helped change me and my life in such a way, through but also beyond so many shadows, as if letting go of a huge enormous backpack, that I now felt so strong and agile, that I take on so much (GeneKeys DeepDive, GeneKeys Hosting, Human Design RaveABC, Permaculture), that I skip the depth of all of them, usually/mostly. And those are just the things I do for fun (!) And then all the books I (make myself) read, related to any and all of those. Pffff…
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