I am saying this with the utmost love: Fuck you Sjef! I don’t know what you did. But you did something.
All I can think of is what if I am an egotistical nazi bitch ?!
It’s not like you said anything new to me. But the patterns seen are getting more and more uncomfortable. I can’t sleep. The fear of that outburst of energy, the alienation, going it alone, rejection, but wait, maybe I can soften the blow and control the direction.
What a nightmare to be confined in ones own made up prison. There’s only fear, everything else is an excuse and mind mumbo jambo. Boxes of this knowledge and that knowledge.
I don’t know if the poking feature still exists on Facebook. But you are the living version of it. I find your impact clarifying, clean and simple. I’m still processing our chat.
Aesha Castellano, Switzerland
I’ve been ruminating, and like to share with you that I very much appreciate what you do and how you respond to people on the Facebook groups.
I’ll be honest I haven’t always felt this way lol. A few times your replies didn’t resonate with me and impacted me in a negative way. However this was also in the beginning of my experiment when I knew very little (I still don’t know everything) and was in the mind feeling entitled to know everything all at once, a quick fix.. which we both know will never help anyone. You truly do need to experiment for yourself before you can ever begin to understand it.
I mention all of this because I went down a rabbit hole on the interactive group where someone was questioning HD and why the higher ups don’t explain things in a way that ‘makes sense’ to the newbies. You actually responded to a commenter that totally was on an ego/mind trip so deep that he did not even comprehend or listen to a word you had to say. Yet everything you were saying made total sense. You were not being rude or condescending or any of what the other commenter had been perceiving it.
Anywho, I just wanted to share with you. This journey has had ups and downs and what ifs and the like but I’m finally starting to put the puzzle pieces together by using my S&A.
Jackson, New Jersey, USA
Sjef is a valuable guide/teacher/coach for Human Design or life in general. No nonsense, no fluff, no unicorns, rainbows, just the facts and deep knowledge. Delivered in a way that is correct for him and also for you.
I have discovered his guidance to be sobering and stabilizing when things are approaching a level of “gross”.
Sometimes a unicorn does fly by magically though.
Highly valued and recommended.
G.M. Nova Scotia, Canada
I know Sjef as a living example of ‘being yourself’. No more difference between him and living Strategy and Authority. Human Design lives inside him, it is him and he is himself.
He is an example of how Human Design works as a tool to really be yourself, completely.
Sjef encourages you again and again to experiment with your S&A, to practice, to find out for yourself what it all means. He is sharp, straight as an arrow.
He doesn’t care for the bla, bla stories, no room for that stuff. He’s piercing right through your excuses and made up stories.
And also, with so much humor and lightness of being, he is fully present, and in the next moment, confronting you with what he sees and notices.
Wassenaar, The Netherlands
I’m a Reflector 6/2 with a past full of fear, some trauma here and there, a lot of different issues, self doubt and lots of insecurity. I followed a lot of therapy in many ways. This year I discovered that where therapy ends, Human Design (HD) begins.
In July 2016, when I met Sjef for the first time for a Reflector Transit Cycle Session, I already had some knowledge about HD through a reading back in 2007. When I first found out about HD, I didn’t get to understand how to read and use my own design and lunar cycle and couldn’t work with it.
My session with Sjef was an inspiring one and soon it became clear there were many things and facts I learned the wrong way, or at least in a different way, which kept me in the illusion I had control over my life. I suffered a make-ability syndrome haha. My mind did run the show back then, for 100%, despite all the inner work and spiritual things I had done for many, many years. In fact I can see now that all the inner work brought me further away from myself!
That first session was confronting, but in a good way and very necessary. Many triggers that day! And they slowly got into my system. Triggers to my past conditioning, to all that I believed in… All my beliefs, in everything, turned upside down. Okay…so life is not how I always learned it would be.
It felt like my foundation was swept away, I felt completely lost and confused for a few weeks. Nice thing about Sjef, I could always email him when I had questions or when I felt ‘a need to share’. Everything was welcome and that strengthened my self confidence.
The first few months it felt really exciting to email. All the things my mind made up to not ask questions, to not share. The judgment I had about myself being unimportant. Such a low self-esteem I had just 9 months ago. I must say I feel so much stronger and more confident now. I started following my Strategy and Authority with almost every decision, after my first session. I also started journaling with my Lunar Cycle and soon I discovered myself in a monthly recurring kind of pattern. My S&A gave me lots of rest and sort of feeling a foundation by following this experiment.
In September 2016 I booked my second session with Sjef for some deepening and support. First words on that recording; “Congratulations! You did good! 🙂 ” Huh? How?! I felt terrible!! After that compliment I don’t have direct memories of the rest of the session. My mind was in denial that day. That day and the days after. Denial and resistance…
Everything Sjef said during that session was filtered and twisted into a negative perception of my experience. During my ride back home it made me believe the session was worthless. Wasted money! It even twisted Sjef into a monster! A really scary, dominant monster hahaha. My mind rebelled. Couldn’t handle the changes that were coming. Scared to lose control.
I caught my mind doing so when I finally dared to listen back the recording (cause that didn’t felt tempting at all!). And I couldn’t believe my own ears… We had fun!! At least I could hear I had! So much humor and laughter! My mind had made up a story so different from the truth!? Wow…that’s weird to discover?! What a liar!! It puts a negative thick veil over the actual experience to create drama and prevent changes. This crystal clear ‘dis-covery’ created a shift in my perception of how I saw myself and why I got stuck in my past, negative experiences and why I created drama all my life. When I could see this fact so clearly, I made a commitment to myself; I will never let this happen again!
In approximately six months guidance with Sjef, in aura, through Skype and via email I learned more about myself and how I should function, than I had learned in the past five to ten years. In six months I went from feeling lost and confused to a much more easy, positive and pleasant life. Despite the fact that HD is nót about a happy, fun-loving blissful life like so many spiritual belief-systems pretend life should be in such a way. It’s just that my life suits me more and more, just by following my S&A and a growing state of awareness to not let my mind be the decision maker. To not let my mind run the show all the time. Great experience!
You should try it 🙂 Sjef’s teachings are easy to pick up and integrate in your life, IF you try and experiment with it… IF you truly want to change into your ‘self’, into the person you are designed to be. I experienced that if you really go for it, Sjef will be with you with attention and a wise and warm heart.
I enjoy his honest and direct way of teaching with his talent to go straight to the core of what matters in the moment. To me I experience his guidance as the fastest and clearest way to learn how to deal with me and my life. To slowly step out of my ‘not self’ and eventually become my true ‘self’. With passion, patience and a touch of humor he will guide you step by step on your journey… I would say; give yourself a great gift and take the first step! If Sjef is correct for you, you won’t regret it. 🙂
Zutphen, The Netherlands
I was re-connected with Sjef in a period of my life in which I knew things were going to be different. I just did not know how. I was riding a rollercoaster of frustration and I wanted it to stop. I was already searching for means to stop the rollercoaster. I already had found some help through the official channels. I was facing bankruptcy, a divorce, an identity crisis and homelessness. My life was breaking down. I found a psycho-therapist who helped me a great deal, up to point X, if you like. Someone who helped me figure out ways to stop the rollercoaster.
Sjef came in with another approach. Maybe it’s not about stopping the rollercoaster. Maybe it is about riding it. The first thing that happened is I tried to praise him for this insight. Because it was brilliant. He didn’t want anything of it. Sjef is not a guru. It was not an accomplishment, it was simply an observation, so he said.
Sjef refuses to be a guru. Sjef is a coach. So he introduced me to Human Design by drowning me in it. It was an experiment for us both. He trusted my ability to swim. I swam. Till this very day I don’t really understand half of what he said and what he is saying. It doesn’t matter. He speaks to my design. My design knows.
I can’t and won’t read the right (Human Design) books. I’m not “totally into it”. I have the interest but not the time. Remember I’m on a rollercoaster, everything goes in a certain speed. I’m alive and life is big. I’m swimming, this is what I do. Be the eye of the twister, he said. Remarkable enough, I understood. I still fail every now and then but I understand what he means by this.
Sjef is different from me, he leads another life. He cannot stand to be in my presence longer than a couple of hours. Most of the people in this world can’t. Sjef teaches me that this is not a rejection. How long can you stand a rollercoaster if it is not your rollercoaster to ride? But if you ride it, for as far as you can enjoy it; you can enjoy it!
It’s a simple as it is absolutely complex. For now, so far, he showed me that I am very much equipped for the life I lead and nobody else is. In his ability to differentiate he teaches me to differentiate and accept and grow into me being me. And letting everybody else be themselves. The man is bigger than I am, stronger then I am, he laughs louder than I do. he brings the laughing Buddha out in me.
I am experimenting. I am experimenting with not trying anymore to slow down the rollercoaster but riding it. I can’t know where it will bring me. There is a difference though, and it is significant. I’m living the difference. Sjef had the ability to differentiate to the max. If you are open for that, if that is what you need, he can coach you. He will not establish your ego or your victimhood. There is no comfort or salvation. He is not into projecting your doubts and fears. Sjef is not a shrink. Sjef asks questions. Hard ones. Not about you but about everything. This is helpful if you would like to be part of everything. It can’t be helpful if you are only into you.
In communication with Sjef it is impossible to just focus on you. He doesn’t even speak to you. He addresses your design and makes you curious about what that thing is. Then he tells you it is actually about you but that side of you that is beyond your control. He will puzzle you. Sjef knows. He knows a lot of things. This does not make him an asshole. He grins a lot. For me this is comforting. I will never know what he knows. I can only know what I know. We are different but equal. But he brought me exactly that insight. By NOT being a guru. By simple being.
I can’t say I need him. But I’m very glad to have found him. I would have learned or not, one way or another. There is no dependence. There is trust. The profundity of trust. The fat, obnoxious laughing Buddha. And this thing is his thing. This is what he brings. He lays his truth on so thick, to seduce you to lay yours. Simply to look at it. No security’s, no conclusions, just the experiment. Lay down you truth and see how true it is. When it is not true, no prob, continue from there.
Vera Louisa Aikens
Amsterdam, The Netherlands